Monday, December 20, 2004
Even mom admits my sister seems more a step-mom than a sister.
For one who lives without regrets ninety-nine percent of the time, this is the one percent that has eluded me. If I would name one regret in my life, I guess it would have to be the inability to maintain a good chummy relationship wit my sister. Her sole purpose in life appears to be seeking enjoyment via making life difficult for me and also via sowing discords between mom and I. I have no idea why it is so difficult for the two of us to get along, every single thing I do pricks her. On a frequent basis, she likes to intrude upon my private space, whisper baseless threats to expose my acts to mom, interrupt arguments between mom and I just to make things get heated up even more, among other things. It is really hard for me to be a good sister to her when she is being sulky/irritable everyday and takes great pride in refusing to mind her own business. I have tried. And failed. And do not believe this is merely a passing phase. I am forced by her own actions, to detest her. It's rather depressing how things turn out, but she doesn't seem to want things to change for the better at all. Thus far, the ball has always been in her court. I am, and will always be, in constant envy of other siblings and their better relationships.
For one who lives without regrets ninety-nine percent of the time, this is the one percent that has eluded me. If I would name one regret in my life, I guess it would have to be the inability to maintain a good chummy relationship wit my sister. Her sole purpose in life appears to be seeking enjoyment via making life difficult for me and also via sowing discords between mom and I. I have no idea why it is so difficult for the two of us to get along, every single thing I do pricks her. On a frequent basis, she likes to intrude upon my private space, whisper baseless threats to expose my acts to mom, interrupt arguments between mom and I just to make things get heated up even more, among other things. It is really hard for me to be a good sister to her when she is being sulky/irritable everyday and takes great pride in refusing to mind her own business. I have tried. And failed. And do not believe this is merely a passing phase. I am forced by her own actions, to detest her. It's rather depressing how things turn out, but she doesn't seem to want things to change for the better at all. Thus far, the ball has always been in her court. I am, and will always be, in constant envy of other siblings and their better relationships.
